Chronically Ironic

All ridiculously original material by Noël DeCevoir

I am a 30-ish-year old female with a somewhat average life, so far. I have no crazy or exciting ethnicity, I have no “I used to be a crack addict” story, I have no Burning Bed Syndrome. I am not an insane fashion or shoe diva, and I kind of subscribe to the philosophy that if it is not available at Target, I don’t need it. I like puppies and kitties and cigarettes and shootin’…and these are my stories.

·Happy Birthday, Asshole!

·No One Knows What Goes On Behind Closed Doors.

·Does This Ass Make My Ass Look Fat?

·Happy Balut Day to Me!

·I didn’t get to See Nine Inch Nails because the Venue Caught Fire.

· I am NOT in the Right Hands, Apparently

·My Time in the SS

·That Ain’t No Puppy!

·A Royal Self-Screwing

·”Wait, Let Me Take Off my Crucifix!”

·I Was A Teenage Liar.

·I Am NOT A Hippie!!

·Are You Finished With That?

·Introducing…The Stealth Maverick

·Collard Greens n’ Roaches

·Connecticut – Another Smart Choice!

·The Gravy Incident

·Oh, the Places You Won’t Go!

·But No, It’s GOOD!

·Summer Session Cesspool SuckFest

·Trying to Buy a House with Marginal Credit

·I Married A Gay Man!

·Genius is Fleeting.

·My Second-to-Last Semester of Higher Education

·The Stinky Bathroom

·Who Wants to Steal a Plant?

·I Ran Away From Skinheads, Successfully, in 1987

·My Uterus, The Car: Part I - Anticipation

·My Uterus, The Car: Part II – Agony